Finally Loving Life

I had a day where I kept being reminded. Reminded of everything, past, present, future. It’s like I kept asking myself, Do you remember? Do you remember who you are, who you were? And the problem is… I do remember, and I’m trying to fight my way out of the fear of the known and unknown of the present so I can embrace what is, and what is positive and abundant for me.

The place and space where I feel the safest, and where my priority is my own personal peace. A place where I can shut out the noise of everyone and everything making demands on how someone like me should show up for them (society) and save them (those who created this mess), all while I am fighting to save myself so I don’t drown. But not only that, not just merely survive… but to thrive. Thrive in the abundance that lies within and be able to do so without allowing others to place guilt or shame on me for doing so. To value my own happiness enough to feel that it is worthy enough to show up for me, even if that means I can no longer show up for you. That’s the battle.

To be free to acknowledge the voice and prickly feeling that rises to the surface when you have certain conversations with random people, or even people you know. The places, spaces, people, and things that still have a way of subtly reminding you of who you used to be but also telling you that it is never too late because you are still that individual. That voice that we have a habit of shushing when it tries to let us know that it is never too late. Never too late to begin again, to start over, to pick up where you left off. But here is the big one, it is never too late to center self. Center your own personal happiness.

To move pieces of your life around like feng shui to invite peace and positivity in, and remove pieces that mess up the flow of alignment to the best version of you. To realize that making your life about you and your happiness automatically ensures that those around you and the places you take up space in will experience that peace and abundance as well.

So yes, tap into what was, what still is, and what can still be. The one that loved endless escapes through the halls of museums. The one who used to dress in your personal style that expressed who you are and how you feel and made you feel confident. Speaking of confidence, the one who wore their hair proudly the way they wanted and let their thoughts and laughter be their billboard to the world to advertise who they are.

To put on music and let the lyrics and beat move through your body as you released joy, pain, sensuality, and whatever else you experienced in the moment. Skip, be joyful and playful, because what time does is remind us that it is moving, and it is moving fast. And whatever amount of time you have in this physical realm is precious. So spend it wisely. It is yours and yours alone to determine how and what you want to spend it on, and whatever you decide is up to you and is valid.

I think we underestimate the power of free will. So look at the puzzle pieces that life has handed you and create the most beautiful picture you are able to. Make your future self so proud that when it looks back over the years, it smiles with joy, joy that you were able to experience such a beautiful life, and joy that you finally got out of your own way and gave yourself permission to do so.

Until next time, love you lots! -Sacred