So, I recently found out that my job position will be coming to an end once my contract expires this summer. It turns out that the program that funded our positions will no longer be available. I don’t even know where to start, because so many thoughts pop into my mind—some good, some not so good.
On one hand, I find myself wanting to say, “Not again! Why does this keep happening? When will I know stability?” But, interestingly enough, that trigger inside is so quiet now that it wasn’t even worth going down the rabbit hole to figure out what it had to say about all of this. Looks like some of this work I’ve been doing on myself is actually paying off.
On the other hand, the part of me that’s seemingly taken over—the empowering force within—is saying, “We’ve been here before, and just like we made it through then, we’ll make it through again.” This is an opportunity to really tap in and ask myself: What do I see for my future self? Am I at a crossroads, and is this my chance to move forward into the next phase of my life, leaving the past phase behind? Now that I have this opportunity, do I want things to stay the same? And if so, that’s totally okay, or do I want to level up?
What does leveling up even mean? Do I want to move? If so, where? Do I want to make more money? Do I want to switch fields? Do I want to take online courses and learn new skills? What do I want to do?
Sometimes, the ending of one thing is just making room for the beginning of something great. As I sit in nervous excitement for what’s about to unfold, I also take a moment to shower myself with recognition and praise for how far I’ve come. There was a time when this kind of news would have sent me into a depressive episode, but look at me—handling it like the champ that I am (and always have been).
Now, don’t get me wrong, I shed a tear here and there as fear turned into nervous, excited energy, but the point is that I have grown so much in the past year, especially in taking on the responsibility of improving my mental health and quality of life. Sometimes, we don’t realize how much we’ve grown or how far we’ve come until moments like this happen. It’s in those moments that you realize, even if you’re not exactly where you envision yourself yet, the growth you’ve experienced to get here is beautiful.
I really don’t know exactly what I’m going to do, but I do know that whatever happens, not only will it be alright, but it will work in my favor. I say all this, and I may cry again at some point when it feels uncomfortable, lol, but I know that what’s meant for me won’t pass me by. And, honestly, being uncomfortable during a transition is perfectly normal. The key is to not let the circumstances of the moment overtake your mental state.
Remember, little by little, my friends. Here’s to new beginnings!
Love you lots!
Sacred
Finally Loving Life 
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