It’s easy to get lost in the whirlwind of responsibilities, financial obligations, and the constant pressure of adulting. Sometimes, we can find ourselves feeling like the universe is testing our limits, as if we’re doing everything right, yet the goalposts keep moving, leaving us feeling drained and frustrated. And that’s exactly how I felt after the last couple of months—financially, emotionally, and mentally drained.
In the span of just two months, I experienced a series of events that seemed designed to chip away at both my patience and my financial stability. First, my car got hit while parked. Then, as if that weren’t enough, while it was being repaired, the rental car I was driving suffered a rock to the windshield, cracking it. It seemed like the universe was mocking my attempt at responsible adulthood.
You see, before all of this chaos, I had made a decision to put myself last—forgoing any little indulgences to take care of my car. I convinced myself that it was more important to fix my car than to spend a little on something for me. All I really wanted was a record player. I had been dreaming of cozy winter nights, combing through vintage records, listening to them on my new record player, and finding peace in the lyrics of songs past and present as I processed everything happening around me. But, in the spirit of responsibility, I let that dream go.
I didn’t have the money to do it all—car repairs, debts, and pampering myself—so I opted for the practical route, or so I thought. I took care of the car, paid the bills, and tucked my desires away for “another time.” Then came the accident, followed by the windshield damage on the rental car, insurance issues, and unexpected out-of-pocket expenses. Before I knew it, I had spent a small fortune on car repairs that were completely out of my control.
And as the bills piled up, so did my disappointment. I had convinced myself that I didn’t have enough for the things that brought me joy, yet here I was, spending money on circumstances that I didn’t even cause. The weight of it all felt suffocating, and I couldn’t help but wonder: How did I end up here? I thought I had been making the responsible choice by putting off my happiness, but all it led to was a bunch of expenses I never saw coming.
Then, something shifted.
I realized that in focusing so much on being “responsible,” I had neglected one important thing: my own joy. It’s easy to get lost in the mindset of doing what we “should” do—pay the bills, handle the responsibilities, and always put ourselves last—but what about today? What about now? So, after much contemplation, I made a decision. If I was going to be figuring out how to pay off car repairs, I could also figure out how to bring some joy back into my life.
And that’s how I ended up buying myself the record player that I had wanted for so long to get. Not just any record player, but a beautiful, high-quality one. I went to a few record stores, sifting through old albums, reliving the memories that they brought, and finding pieces of music that took me back to the good old days. I let myself fully enjoy the experience, not rushing through it or feeling guilty. I was making space for joy, for the things that nourish my spirit.
As I headed home, my arms full of records and a heart full of excitement, I realized that sometimes it’s okay to prioritize joy, even when life feels like it’s throwing everything at you. I knew I still had to figure out how to manage the financial aftermath of the car repairs and the inevitable credit card payments, but I also knew that I could manage that too.
The balance is in understanding that life will always be full of challenges. Sometimes, you save for a rainy day, and a tsunami hits. Other times, you take the leap and let yourself experience the present moment, knowing that somehow, everything will work out in the end. That’s how we’ve made it this far, right?
I’m not suggesting anyone run up their credit cards or throw caution to the wind, but what I am saying is that we can’t let our fears or financial stress paralyze us from seeking the things that bring us joy. I know my income, I know how easily I can pay off my debt, and I know that I’m the only one who can ensure I get the balance I need between responsibility and indulgence. The trick is to never lose sight of yourself in the process.
So, with my record player and my new outlook on life, I’m going to continue creating my little slice of happiness. It’s not about escaping reality, but about finding balance. The adulting will always be there, but so will the music, the joy, and the peace that comes from honoring my needs, not just my responsibilities.
Gratitude for what is has a way of shifting your perspective. And for today, I’m grateful for the unexpected lessons that brought me here—to a moment of joy, a record player, and a deeper understanding of the balance between adulting and living fully.
Love you lots!
-Sacred
Finally Loving Life 
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